Just couple of days left before Christmas. I am counting hours until I am off from work. Sipping coffee in my cozy office downtown, watching snowflakes bouncing up and down as if they are all part of a nicely planned flash mob. I am thinking of you, and my heart lights up with pleasant warmth and a hope for a happy life together.

I go to my computer to look for the best Christmas present I can afford. A dinner date, that will end up in a hotel room. Just you and me. I bought a webinar that I’ve been studying all last week to surprise you that night. That’s so important for us, especially now when we became parents. Our adorable toddler deserves a wonderful family we can be!

You said no. There will be no date. I’m just being stupid.

It didn’t happen overnight. You never wanted me, and I am living with it for years. In fact, our sex life never existed. Just a couple of random acts that I initiated.

Having different levels of sex drive is a common thing. What is not common is to talk about men having lower drive than their women. Do you know how does it make me feel? Worthless, unwanted and miserable. It’s like no one in the world have this problem but me. You know why? Because women who have the same problem feel intimidated to talk about it. We are scared everyone is going to think we are less of women because our men don’t want us as often as we need.

Just putting it out there. It’s not my fault. Not my men’s fault. If you are feeling the same way, you are not alone.